Corona-Momming Tip #5: Take a breath, and take a minute

At various intervals over the past few days, I’ve found myself overwhelmed by stress (no surprise there). The latest example of this occurred 20 minutes ago when my son and I were puzzling over how to log in to Quaver Music to get his music assignment. We had no idea what we were doing, and my son became visibly upset. He shared that he was “SO STRESSED” and “JUST WANTED TO FINISH [HIS] WORK ALREADY.”

I got how he was feeling, because I was feeling equally stressed. My shoulders were up at my ears (and continue to be as I type this, if I’m being honest). I felt completely helpless and super-frustrated.

How I’ve chosen to respond to experiences like this (and there have been many): I’ve forced myself to stop, take a breath, and take a minute before doing anything. Before talking, before moving, and certainly before trying to problem solve.

Because when we’re super-stressed, we can’t solve anything. There’s no way I can successfully navigate Quaver Music if my head is exploding. I need to get myself into a different headspace before I can effectively take action.

It may take you just a minute to get into a different headspace. It may take you 5 minutes (as was the case for me; once I got my head straight I realized all I needed to do was contact the music teacher for further instructions). It may take you 30 minutes or an hour, in which case, do whatever you need to do in the meantime (screen time for kids/for you, etc.) until you’re back in the right headspace for problem solving.

So when the world comes crashing down, as it will multiple times each day until this crises subsides, take a breath, and take a minute. Or several minutes. And teach your kids to do the same. It will help all of you reset, so you can return to the problem with a clearer head.

 

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I’m Ilyse Dobrow DiMarco, Ph.D., aka DrCBTMom. DrCBTMom.com combines the expert advice of a self-help book with the warmth and readability of a mommy blog.
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