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  • Holidays With Kids Series, #1: Set your holiday expectations low

    As soon as my son was born, I started dreaming about his first holiday season, even though it was only April. By the time December rolled around I had everything perfectly planned out: adorable Christmas sweater, check. Toy menorah, check. Appointment to sit on Santa’s lap, check. I’d waited so many years to bring the magic of the holidays to…

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  • When feeling #grateful is not enough

    From a distance, Emma is the picture of good fortune. Her nails are flawlessly manicured, her makeup expertly applied. She somehow maintains a neat ponytail, despite the windy weather outside, and her perfectly tailored silk blouse and pants are accented with tasteful, elegant jewelry. Yet from where I’m seated, in a chair directly across from her, I can see that…

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  • Helping moms manage their own back-to-school anxiety

    We’ve all seen those back-to-school ads: kids look depressed while moms look positively gleeful, happily dancing through the aisles of an office supply store as they lob pencils and glue into their carts. But in reality, moms are often anxious at back-to-school time. They worry about everything from how they’ll get everything on the school supply list to how their…

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  • The importance of paying attention to your “emotional bandwith”

    In this week’s New York Times Parenting newsletter, writer Jessica Grose explains her decision not to have another child. She employs the term “emotional bandwith,” noting that she didn’t have the emotional bandwith (what I’d define as capacity to effectively cope emotionally; she defines it as “patience” and “humanity”) for a third kid. I talk to my mom patients about…

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  • How to be a baseball mom (or a soccer mom, or a lacrosse mom…)

    I was a musical theater nerd growing up, but thanks to my husband’s genes my kid is all about sports. I’m slowly trying to adjust to this world of far-away tournaments and brown knee stains that never come out in the wash. I’m learning to cope with the feelings that arise when your kid is in the midst of a…

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  • Moms and Dads and the parental division of labor

    I cannot tell you how often I hear something like this, “My husband and I agreed that we would share the childcare 50-50. We had the best intentions. And then we had our kid, and the split started looking more like 20-80. Now I’m overworked and resentful all the time. What happened?“ Psychologist Darcy Lockman actually came up with an…

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About Me

I’m Ilyse Dobrow DiMarco, Ph.D., aka DrCBTMom. DrCBTMom.com combines the expert advice of a self-help book with the warmth and readability of a mommy blog.
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